Victoire
by Amy0Veronica
Summary: The need to survive was like a parasite within me. I didn't care what atrocities I had to carry out to keep us alive or how they tarnished me. That is until I am unwittingly made into a champion for the light and manipulated into a quest to destroy the Ring with a ragtag team of individuals, all honourable, many odorous, some humorous and one as handsome as a fairytale prince.
1. Chapter 1

_Author Note:_ Hi everyone I want to write about something different in the Lotr Universe - the anti-hero. I want to explore a character that had been raised in a tough and often disheartening upbringing. At first it might be hard for viewers to identify with Victoire as the main character with the trauma she has made mention to and the fact that she is not a nice person, and at this stage has very little redeeming qualities (other than her dark humor). The idea is that this story will be a Legolas romance, but one which is slow and navigates the sheer disparity in Legolas and the main character's upbringings and worlds.

I have always found such complex characters interesting to read and this is going to be a mammoth but fun undertaking, which is where I need YOU awesome readers to give me feedback. I love hearing what you think about characters etc! This chapter has themes of violence and gore and mentions themes of a sexual nature.

 **Chapter One**

 **From Small Beginnings**

The light was blinding, blasting through any visible nook and window of the ramshackle building.

But more disorientating was the sound. It rent through the air, cutting it like butter, ripping apart the fragments of the earth.

I fell off the client who rolled from the bed with a roar of surprise, scrambling away from the window.

Still naked, I staggered to the window, shielding my eyes with the back of my hand, trying to see through the blindingly bright light. I desperately wanted to see what had caused something so unnatural. It felt like the land had been eviscerated.

One with such circumstances as my own did not do well to miss out on an opportunity, whatever it may be; even if it was just escaping what looked like the proverbial shit heap that had landed on the township of Weather Hill.

One did not survive long as a working girl without being able to read a situation or see a threat from a mile away. Scrambling to the stained blue sack of a dress scrunched on the floor I threw it on, shaking my breasts into place in the ill-fitting chest area. I pushed my feet into the too large boots I owned and slyly swiped the pouch of coins the portly customer had delicately and with much disdain placed on the dresser.

I don't know if he noticed, because I was out of the room and down the stairs into a throng of girls scrambling around in the confusion without a glance back.

Adelia was there, her green eyes finding mine. She inclined her head to the doorway and I nodded, meeting her there as the sound of my bellowing customer reached my ears.

"Fucking thief!" he cried, the sound covered up in the din, not likely having the effect he desired. I grabbed two black cloaks off the customer coat rack. With slight hesitation, the objects catching my eye at the last minute, I took the scabbard of a sword and a knife from the rack that customers had to place weapons in before accessing the services. With a last look behind me at the pudgy customer trying to scuttle naked down the stairs towards me I pushed through the front door. I gave him a grin and a salute before stepping forth.

Passing over the threshold into the street was like entering a different land, one not unlike the religious painting's depiction of hell. Horrible gut wrenching screams and crying rose from the debilitating smoke; I could make out the glow of flames against the night sky in the near distance. The nearest buildings were intact but after that the rest were wiped out, only wood and debris visible from rubble and steaming soil. Adelia went to run in the opposite direction from the madness, but I grabbed her elbow.

"I have to see," I told her.

"Are you crazy Victoire?" she breathed, the fear in her eyes offset by the golden glare of the nearby flames.

"Not crazy just opportunistic," I grinned trying to soothe her concerns, "I'll meet you at our tree, make sure you hide yourself up high and take this," I rushed, pressing the dagger, cloak and bag of money into her hands. She knew better than to waste time trying to argue with me. She pulled the cloak on and with the hood pushed low she slunk away into the darkness.

I pulled the second cloak on as I ran, awkwardly strapping the sword to my hip. The scabbard strap was too wide which made the sword hang too low on my hips and caused the scabbard to clatter against the movement of my legs.

On swift feet I moved towards the center of the mayhem. I noticed a dead body close to the crackling fire, the limbs and head at an awkward angle. I quickly bent down and emptied the dead man's belt of his coin pouch, shoving it in between my breasts.

I rushed past a screaming woman trying to avoid her searching eyes, her face bubbling and hair matted. The stench of burning flesh was thick and turgid in the air. I pushed my palm to my face as a gag involuntarily ripped up my throat.

Then I saw it, encased in a crater of flame and rubble where it had embedded several meters deep in the earth.

I had heard talks of objects like this. They were supposedly sent from the heavens and were a very rare occurrence. Some called them shooting stars.

I would later wonder if something fae had taken hold of my senses as to act so recklessly. I was never one to pass on an opportunity, but never one to take unmitigated risks. I jumped down the side of the crater, tumbling down the steep craggy decline, the surface scorching hot through my boots.

I rushed forward, avoiding the many spot fires. I reached the centre, the heat from the shiny granite like object ferocious. For all the destruction it had caused it was barely bigger than my skull. Taking off my cloak, which was thankfully made of thick winter wool, I wrapped it around the star fragment.

Trying to ignore the unexpected heat it gave off from behind the cloak I attempted to lift it. I stumbled forward with a cry at the sheer weight, my skinny arms unable to take the astonishing weight. It made me stumble forward, my knees pulling the cloak from the surface as I fell onto the star fragment.

I screamed, the noise escaping my clenched teeth, the sound similar to that of a dying animal. I had been burnt before but this feeling was more painful than flesh meeting something hot, it consumed me, reaching every part of me. As if it had been waiting for me to hold it – or perhaps because an object of the divine was desecrated by the touch of an unworthy mortal– the star fragment cracked open from underneath me with sound that split the air itself and which surely burst my eardrums. I could no longer hold myself up and slumped over its surface.

My head roared and I didn't know if it was my body being obliterated or if it came from the star fragment itself. With every part of my being I wanted to push myself away but I couldn't move. My body was so caught up in the torturing pain it would no longer listen to commands. It felt like I was shackled in purgatory.

Through the cracks of my closed eyes there was a bright white light, getting brighter and brighter until the lids of my eyes could no longer block it out. If I had been more aware I would have noticed the air crackling around me and the roaring reaching a horrible crescendo as the bowels of the star fragment lost its war with the atmosphere and crumbled into me.

Everything went black.

My senses came back suddenly; I could see the clear blue sky, the sudden shift in time confusing me for a moment.

I realised that I was not where I had been previously, but lying against other soft objects. I recoiled as I suddenly registered the horrible smell surrounding me.

 _Death_. The smell of decomposing flesh had long ago been engrained into my memory.

I craned my sore neck and screamed. I was nestled amongst several dozen bodies, the smell and sight of charred flesh of the bodies making the vomit fly to my mouth. I sobbed as I pushed myself up, the horrible ache in my body making itself known as I scrambled on hands and knees across the slippery and bloodied flesh. I reached the edge of what could only be described as a mass grave and couldn't control my retching any longer. Over the years my life had not been all sunny days and rainbows but waking up in a ditch of dead bodies was a little more macabre than I was used to.

The vomit burned through my throat and mouth, only stomach acid and bright pink foam coming forth, splashing against the ground. I was often so hungry that my stomach felt like it was eating itself so the pink tinge of blood didn't seem like something that would be unusual. I hadn't eaten a sufficient amount of food in a long time. The working girls were fed a meagre amount more than the servants to keep us from being skeletons as the matron believed that clients did not like that sort of thing. I often gave my sister, a servant at the proud establishment, a large portion of my food rations.

My mind quickly jumped to my sister, my younger twin. I had to get to her; she would be worried, wondering why I had never come back for her. A horrible urgency filled me at the thought that she had been discovered or had moved on out of fear that I was dead.

My hands quickly went to my hip but both the sword and money was gone. With horror I realized that other than a few scraps of cloth still clinging on and blood and gore from the mass grave I was naked. It wasn't a good start to finding my sister, generally as a rule I felt more secure in clothing when making trips outside my bedroom. Heaving a steadying breath I looked around, noticing a landmark in the position of the trees that were surrounding me. I wasn't far from our meeting spot.

"Aye!" a man came out of nowhere, a shovel in hand. "Ye were dead! I just finished dragging yer body to the pit," his face looked positively ashen, fear lighting his face. "Ye must be a witch!" I watched the fearful malice take over his face as he came to what he thought must be the only rational answer.

"Oh for fucks sake," I couldn't believe what my night had deteriorated into, the feeling of 'what next' merging with a bone deep tiredness. Without further thought the man ran forward, the shovel raised.

It was in no way the first attempt made on my life, and taking what he said about my previous state of dead to not be true, no-one had succeeded yet. I charged him, ducking away from the shovel as he swung it up, obviously not expecting my offensive action. I felt the edge of it scrape my stomach as I passed behind him and kicked him bodily in the back with all my weight against one foot. He dropped the shovel but recovered from the push and turned around more quickly than I thought. Rather than making the time to collect the shovel he came at me with a fist. In that moment something strange happened as his fist connected with my face and the fear bubbled up in my stomach.

He screamed. It was a horrible keening sound as if I had split all his bones with my face. I didn't see what happened because my eyes had involuntarily closed, but as I opened my eyes after the impact of his fist, the skin of my check raging in pain, he was withering in pain on the ground, steam rising from his body as if he had been fried, before becoming still.

I bent down in shock feeling for a pulse at his neck. There was nothing… he was dead. But _how?_

Holding my hand against my nose at the renewed smell of burnt flesh. If I never had to smell that scent again it would be too soon. I realised the weird sensation happening at my stomach. My stomach streaked with fresh blood which flushed out new blood like a waterfall down my body. Though my skin was dirty and covered in blood it was easy to see the gaping mortal wound in my stomach would kill me where nothing else had. I nearly vomited at the sight of what could have been some organ, maybe my intestine rearing through the seam. The sight made me woozy. I couldn't even bring myself to put pressure on the wound; I couldn't bring myself to touch it at all. I took a deep shuddering breath in, the pain registering as my instincts to survive died down. It was more than a scrape which I had thought at the feel of the impact. I scrunched up my eyes, the frustration and horrible pain making a keening sound escape my mouth. I looked down again and a horrified sound escaped me in shock as I watched the skin start to do something odd. The blood stopped bubbling forth, and the deep red of the wound started t to knit together. _What?_

Suddenly the words he had spoken earlier to me sunk in. _Dead_ , you were dead.

What had happened to me when I had touched the star fragment?

My thoughts turned to my sister again, my brain well attuned to the constant need to be her protector. Without a second thought I bolted towards the meeting spot, gripping my stomach, the pain of whatever it was doing, lancing through me as I ran.

It only took a few minutes to get to the tree, one of the largest in the old forest, gnarly with hidden burrows.

I briefly remembered us as little girls trying to climb to the highest branch.

"Adelia!" I called. For a moment there was no sound and my heart held in a vice.

"Victoire!" the broken relief in her voice was obvious, tears glistening in her green eyes as she descended the tree and gasped at the sight of me, horror in her eyes. She reached for my shoulder. I reared back, pulling away. She jumped slightly, looking at me as if she couldn't recognise me. "Adelia you mustn't touch me; it is not safe. Something happened…"

"What? What happened Victoire?" she asked, the distress of the night appearing to compound on her. "What on earth did you get yourself into? You look like the dead and smell worse than hell…" she said tremulously, her green eyes raking over me.

"I'll let you know soon; we need to get away…" I started to walk in the opposite direction of the town.

"Wait... Why?" She looked confused. "One minute I feared you were dead and was contemplating whether I should go back to the brothel and now we are leaving the town we grew up in?" she asked bewildered at my reasoning.

She did not know that the majority of the town most likely saw my body being dragged away from the crater in town and taken to the mass unmarked grave for all the peasants without family to give them a proper burial.

"I- I will tell you soon, but it is not safe here," I scrambled, wanting to grab a hold of her hand but fearing what could happen if I did. A part of me didn't want to tell her, to save her from the horror she would surely feel.

"Adelia, have you got the knife and money still?" I asked. She nodded and went to produce both, but I only took the knife from her. She passed me the cloak from her shoulders and I swept it around me, the huge size of it covering my nudity. "Adelia, we have to leave…" I forced the issue. She nodded reluctantly.

By mid-afternoon, I was parched and worn, the wound on my stomach was dark pink, a fragile easily reopened layer of skin but more healed than any human should be merely hours after such a cut. I had found a dam and had roughly scrubbed a lot of the dirt and blood off my skin. We stayed parallel to the road but out of easy sight in the tree line. We were taking a short rest when I heard the sound of hooves. Adelia hadn't spoken to me since earlier, even to ask me what had caused my decision to leave our hometown. Her face and the movement of her body had been filled with anger.

"Stay here Adelia and no matter what you hear unless it's me calling for you don't come out," I placed my fingers over my lips before I snuck closer to the road and dropped low into the brush.

In the distance I saw a horse and cart. The rider had a scratchy grey woolen cloak and tall pointed grey hat.

I waited for the cart to draw closer before staggering out onto the road, hunching over to look as weak and pitiful as I could.

"Please, I need your help," I whimpered, arm out stretched towards the slowly trundling cart, the other behind my back gripping the dagger.

The cart stopped and the hat was tilted up to reveal the face of an old man with a long white beard and bushy grey mottled eyebrows. His sparkling blue eyes looked welcoming and non-threatening. The kindness I saw in his eyes caused the plan sketched out in mind to change. I would question him for safe passage to Bree and see whether he would be agreeable rather than stabbing him and asking questions later.

Before I could voice the question he spoke. "I was in the area when a radiant light split across the sky. The shooting star was engulfed in flame, speeding towards the town of Weather Hills. I decided to head there to investigate but it seems that I have already stumbled upon the remnants of the star," he watched me knowingly.

What the old man said disarmed all thoughts in my mind. "What do you speak of?" I asked viciously. "What do you know?"

The old man watched me, not speaking. "You know what I speak of. You are scared and confused. Is that why you are running from Weather Hill?" he asked his omnipresent eyes staring into my own without reserve.

"What do you know of what the star fragment did to me?" I asked clearing through all the uncertainty in my mind and cutting to the chase.

"There is much I don't know but much I can discern. The next destination on my journey was to be the Shire if you and your companion would like to share my company," he said, lighting a pipe and taking a deep puff, watching my obvious discomfort with twinkling eyes and a small uplift of his thin lips.

I didn't bother to ask how he knew of my sister hidden in the shadows of the trees. The old man had shown that he had some sight or ability to glean information that wasn't freely given.

I couldn't discern any malice from him, but I hadn't survived up until now by freely trusting strangers. Despite his knowing nature he was still an old man and if he were to show a malicious side I should be able to overpower him. The old man had also made an insinuation that he may be able to shed some light on what the star fragment had done to me.

Giving the old man a weighing look I called my sister's name. A few moments later there was the sound of leaves crunching and my sister walked warily out from behind a tree.

"Identical in appearance but night and day in character," the old man mused, his voice light as he took another puff of his pipe, blowing out smoke in odd formations. I gave him a dark look, covertly holding the knife under the draping arm of the cloak I wore as I walked around the back to take a seat on his left side, allowing the other side for my sister.

My sister seemingly attempting to over compensate for my rude behavior smiled kindly at the old man.

"Thank you for offering to take us to the Shire. My name is Adelia and this is my sister Victoire," she said, taking the old man's hand out of politeness to step onto the cart.

"It is nice to make both your acquaintances, you can call me Gandalf the Grey," he said.

"I heard you talking to Victoire about a shooting star. Was that what happened in Weather Hill? Why did you speak as if she was the star?" my ardent sister started with the questions once the horse started moving and the cart jostled forward. The old man named Gandalf chuckled with merriment. I scowled from my position next to him. But I remained silent as I wished to know the answers to my sister's latter question.

"I believe that only Victoire can answer the first question of what happened in Weather Hill," Gandalf deflected.

Adelia looked at me expectantly.

"Do you expect me to answer that question in front of a complete stranger Adelia?" I asked dryly, crossing my arms across my chest. She huffed, defiance entering her gaze.

"Well you will tell me because you promised to back in Weather Hill and I haven't heard a word of an explanation since then," she said her gaze shrewd as she attempted to stare me down. "You have heard the stories of Gandalf. Gandalf is a wizard of the Istari, he is trustworthy," she said, fully placing her trust in a stranger.

"I have indeed heard some stories of Gandalf the Grey, but what says that this is truly Gandalf and not a perverted old man planning to take us into the woods to steal our virtues? Even if he is Gandalf, what says the stories are true? What says that he is trustworthy?" I questioned her, Gandalf sitting benignly in between us.

Adelia attempted at a scowl, but there was no malice in it. "Victoire you no longer have your virtue to be taken away and you think the worse of everyone until they prove otherwise, and even then you expect them to spin around and shove a knife in your back," she said heatedly.

"Adelia, are you saying that I'm a soiled dove?" I chimed, raising an eyebrow over narrowed eyes at her, baiting her and daring her to say more.

She huffed but backed down. "You are incorrigible Victoire." 

* * *

_Location: Weather Hill_

"Get moving you filthy snaga!" the command was roared by Lagduf, a Uruk-hai of impressive height and girth. "I want that piece of star junk found!"

The lesser orcs ran haphazardly through the town, catching humans as they ran screaming and burning them out of their houses with glee.

"Round up the humans!" he yelled, spittle flying from his massive fanged maw.

Within the ransacked town square of Weather Hill, the citizens that managed to remain alive were eventually rounded up and guarded by the sizeable army of orcs, led by several bigger and more fearsome Uruk-hai.

"A fragment of star came to this cesspool. I found the hole it created but no star!" Lagduf growled as he walked amongst the humans. "The human who tells me where it is will not die."

The air of fear around the humans changed into desperation.

"I was hiding when I saw a burst of light so bright that it nearly blinded me from its resting place moments after it collided with the earth, but there was no star there come morning," an old man staggered forward, falling to his knees before Lagduf. Lagduf's lips curled in displeasure and with a swing of his fist, the old man was thrown away.

"My patience is wearing thin! There was the scent of _gruiuk_ , a human female, in the hole!" he roared, his fist swinging into another unsuspecting human's head.

A middle aged woman cried out, "I saw something unnatural… we dragged a woman from the middle of the hole. She was dead. The undertaker took her to a mass grave in the woods. I was helping take another body when I saw her rise up out of the grave alive. He attempted to stop her and when his skin touched the skin of her face she killed him dead. The woman ran off but I know of her…"

"Flas undur kurv!" Lagduf spat viciously, the sound of black speech further subduing the crowd of fearful humans, as he strode towards the woman. He wrapped a bear like hand around her neck. _Speak fat whore_.

"Please promise to spare me and my family-" she shuddered in fear under the oppressive ferocity and harsh grip of the Uruk-hai leader.

"Speak," he sneered, bringing his face a hand span away from her own, staring down into her terrified eyes with his own glowing yellow ones.

"I know not which sister it was as they are twins! Their appearance is identical!" she sobbed, snot and tears bubbling over her face, sliding over the black leather skin of Lagduf's hand. "They both worked at the brothel Madam Hausefaur. One was a whore, her name is Victoire and the other was a servant there, her name is Adelia-" the woman scrabbled uselessly at the hand making her choke out her words.

"Show me the brothel," Lagduf ordered, releasing his hold on the woman's throat and shoving her forward. "Remain with the humans! Rauzeg and Margorg, come with me," Lagduf threw over his shoulder as he followed the woman as she scuttled down several streets, the group of lesser orcs moving away from her path like an ocean parting, volleying sneers and hateful jeers at her as she passed. Two massive Uruk-hai parted from their ranks and followed Lagduf.

The woman reached the two story weather board building quickly. Lagduf sneered at her. "Show me where they slept," he ordered, his voice barely legible through the thick Uruk accent as he hastened in his speech. Any remote hint of patience he might have had seemingly disappeared.

The woman shook her head, the whites of her eyes visible, her face grim and pale. "I know not where they slept-" she didn't get to finish her sentence, as Lagduf had already swiped her diminutive body into the wall of the brothel, her head cracking sharply with the wood. She dropped to the ground motionless.

Lagduf proceeded to storm into the brothel, sniffing the air deeply, his nostrils flaring as he scanned the empty first floor. His followed his nose upstairs to a room. The bed was empty, the stained once white sheets tousled. Lagduf scrunched his face up in disgust at the scent of human body fluids that permeated the entire establishment but which was thoroughly focused on the bed. Within the maelstrom of different scents, the scent of the human female was strongest.

Lagduf went to the rickety cupboard that lined the opposite wall and yanked the doors open. The world weary and stained dresses that hung there smelt strongly of the human female. He yanked the dresses off the wooden hangers and took several huge sniffs, memorising the scent. He shoved the pile of clothing at one of the Uruk-hai that stood in the door way.

"Thosishi Rauzeg," he snapped at the Uruk-hai who nodded swiftly and departed the room. _Bag it, Rauzeg._

The scent needed to be preserved for the hunt.

Lagduf breathed rapidly in pleasure at coming closer to achieving his master's orders. The urge to commence the hunt for the gruiuk hazed his senses like the strongest bloodlust. It would be his greatest achievement for his master. _Human female_.

Lagduf walked out of the brothel meeting up with the rest of the orc hoard. For a moment Lagduf looked around at the scared humans, a horrible and deadly smirk rising on his face.

"Vras tul gith," he roared. The orc hoard roared in approval. _Kill them all._

The screams and cries of horror and death echoed over Weather Hill hauntingly.


	2. Chapter 2

_'Twinkle, twinkle, little star, up above the world so high, like a diamond in the sky, when the blazing sun is gone, when he nothing shines upon, then you show your little light, twinkle, twinkle, all the night'. –_ 'The Star' by Jane Taylor.

 **Chapter Two**

 _ **Come Great Things**_

I watched Adelia in disgust.

Adelia was taking to the old man that claimed to be Gandalf the Grey like he was our long lost father.

"Indeed, hobbits are the merriest of folk. Their celebrations do not end until they are either ousted by the host or they eat their host out of house and home," Gandalf chuckled, taking a deep breath from his pipe. Adelia laughed disarmingly.

"That sounds frighteningly similar to the Black Plague that ravaged Weather Hills centuries ago. The plague was either fought off by the host or the host was overcome," I stated.

Both Gandalf and Adelia paused in their exchange of warmth and looked at me, Adelia in barely concealed frustration and Gandalf with some unnamable emotion. The air remained peacefully quiet for too short a time.

Adelia glanced at Gandalf, "Victoire does this to push people away. Her personality is the most effective repellent known to both man and beast," Adelia jibbed meanly.

I scowled, "that's not necessarily true or we wouldn't be in the current company, would we?" I looked away at the evergreen farmland hills that appeared to roll off into the sunset with thickets of trees breaking up the monotony of the paddocks.

"If Gandalf wasn't so honourable and kind I'm sure that you would've been marooned on the side of the road miles ago," she retorted. That wasn't necessarily true, if anyone was to be dumped on the side of the road it would be Gandalf, though it didn't sound like Adelia would support that plan. "Are you going to tell us what happened at Weather Hill with the meteor, Victoire?" my sister suddenly piqued up after some time.

"I'll tell you both what happened if Gandalf tells me what he meant about me being the star fragment," I said.

Adelia huffed, "Instead of instantly blackmailing you could try asking first Victoire, you never know you might be surprised," she said.

Gandalf spoke up, "Adelia is correct Victoire, people are often much more willing to concede information when it is asked for politely," he said. A silence fell between us for a short moment in which I seethed, trying to hold back my retort, before he spoke again "As such I don't believe that is a fair exchange of information, after all I can easily surmise what may have occurred, the exact details do not make the difference," he stated, not looking at me.

A part of me wanted give Adelia a knowing look and say 'see, everyone wants something and nothing is for free'; instead I settled for just giving her a knowing look, to which she gave me her long suffering look.

Deciding to see what he wanted for the information rather than resorting to the pointy end of plan B and making off with his horse and cart, which would get me satisfaction but no information, I asked, "what would be a fair exchange then?"

Gandalf took his eyes away from the road and gave me a hard stare, "I do not hold any illusions that you hold the same respect for life that your sister does, but what I will tell you will mean nothing if I do not get your assurance that you will make good use of what has been bestowed upon you…"

I stared blankly at him, trying to make out what he was talking about. I saw the spark of impatience ignite within his eyes; he expanded with a sigh, "A promise, made with your blood that you shall give me your allegiance."

From the strong and commanding tone in which he spoke I could see that he was more than the merry exterior he had shown Adelia. In his countenance I could discern that he was a born leader, cunning and ruthless when the need arose.

I wondered what he meant by the word allegiance, but didn't bother to ask any questions. He was foolish if he thought any promise I made I would keep unless it suited me.

I inclined my head, a smirk rising on my lips, "sure."

"Then bring forth the dagger you have concealed," he stated, his eyes stony. A small feeling of doubt trickled in the back of my mind that I shouldn't be so quick to underestimate the old man. He believed that my word would somehow be worth something, that a fancy blood oath would make me more willing to do a strangers bidding.

The need to know what had happened to me in Weather Hill made me determined to follow through with the old codger's senile reminiscence of a child's fancy of tying blood to give a promise a special meaning.

I pulled the dagger out from the folds of the cloak and held it at him for a moment, before smirking and spinning the hilt in my hand so that the sharp end was pointed away from him.

He didn't react but pulled the reigns to bring the horse to a stop. He gestured me to get off the cart and after I jumped to the soft dewy ground he followed me, placing his hand into the area of the cart directly behind where he sat. "Cut your palm," he ordered.

Rolling my eyes, I sliced the palm of my left hand without hesitation, clenching my teeth at the slight sting. Suddenly he found what he was looking for and brought it towards me so that the stone that sat on the top of a long wooden staff was touching my bloody palm.

"Hold it," he ordered.

A twinge of worry sparked within me, a feeling that perhaps my pride had gotten me into something I didn't quite understand. But I deflected the paranoia.

I clenched the stone within my slippery palm, feeling like an idiot. "If you don't hurry up I will bleed out," I scowled.

"Will you, starlight of Ilmarë pledge your allegiance to me and any cause that I request of thee for the greater good of Arda and heed my call when that time comes?" the old man demanded, his voice loud and without doubt of intent.

I didn't believe in the hogwash he recited and yet a part of me revolted at the idea of just agreeing to what he wanted without attempting to defy him in some small way.

"I pledge my allegiance to one cause as dictated by you for the greater good of Arda. I will heed your call when the time comes," I said, my lips curling at the anger that flared in his eyes at my attempt to manipulate him.

He seemed to be really passionate about the promise and I wondered if he knew I was changing the terms purely to annoy him as I didn't plan to adhere to them at all.

"Then it is done," he commanded, and there was a flash of light from the end of his staff that made me wince at its unexpected brightness.

"Now that I have _pledged my allegiance_ ," I placed stress on the last three words, "can you tell me what is with all the star references?"

Gandalf placed his staff back in the cart and climbed back into his seat. "You changed the terms of the agreement so I will tell you only what I deem necessary," he inclined his head, holding his hand out for me to get up on the cart. I ignored his hand and climbed up myself.

As I took my seat in the cart, I waited silently in an attempt to give him the impression that I was patient. In reality I was barely restraining the desire to tap my foot irately or stab him; he was one of the most infuriating people I had ever met.

"How about you start your tale first Victoire and I will attempt to fill in the gaps," Gandalf stated calmly, as if he hadn't just viciously asked me for a blood oath and said he would be the one to call the shots.

"Well, it was the middle of the night and I was tending to a client when suddenly the room was bleached with a bright light. It struck me as very unusual," I glanced to Adelia. "I heard an explosion and it shook the foundations of the establishment _."_

"My first thought was to get to Adelia, so while the client was scrambling around I got dressed and took his money. I may be hard to get along with but I am very _resourceful_ ," I shot a charming smile at Gandalf, who frowned as if he didn't agree with this assertion. "I ran downstairs and collected Adelia and parted ways with her, because I had to go see-"

Gandalf interrupted, "What made you part from your sister to investigate?" he asked pensively.

I thought for a moment, "At first I didn't know what had happened and wanted to sate my curiosity, but once I saw what it was I attempt to retrieve it, which was something very uncharacteristic of me; I wouldn't usually decide to pick up a burning lump of rock no matter how much gold it would get from the right buyer. I would have watched from the sidelines and stolen it from the mayor when all the fanfare died down if I decided I wanted it that badly," I shrugged.

"Indeed it seems quite out of the realms of your character to walk thoughtlessly into possible danger," Gandalf commented, his face blank of emotion. I didn't know if it was an insult made to offend or a harmless observation, as I couldn't

Adelia spoke up, "As much as she has shown otherwise, Victoire is very brave; there are many times that she has walked into danger, but you are right, there has to be a good reason or it has to benefit her in some way. You say, Victoire," she addressed me, "that you didn't know at first that it was a stat fragment?"

"Why are you both analysing my motives?" I asked, starting to get annoyed.

"Because I believe it is no odd circumstance of chance and that you were drawn to the star fragment," Gandalf said, lighting his pipe and drawing in deeply, a ponderous look taking over his features. "Continue with your story Victoire," he waved his hand forth.

"Hmm, well, after parting from Adelia I stopped at a dead body I saw and acquired another bag of coin-"

"What happened when you got to the star fragment? I think that is the most pertinent part of the story," Adelia interrupted in frustration.

I shot a devious look at Adelia. "I attempted to pick up the star fragment inside a cloak to protect myself from the heat, but I slipped and touched it with my skin. I have never felt pain like it… I _burned_ , I felt like my whole body was being pulled a part by flame, piece by tiny piece until I blacked out. Next thing I know I woke up in a mass grave… I pulled myself out and a man from Weather Hill saw me and said he had just dragged my dead body to the pit. He obviously thought I was something evil and attacked me. He managed to slice me deep in the stomach with his shovel but then he punched me and as his fist met my face he screamed and collapsed, withering in pain. He died somehow, I don't know how and within a few minutes the wound on my stomach which should have killed me started to heal," I finished the shortened version of events and sat in silence.

Gandalf spoke, "Indeed that was no ordinary fragment of star, I have reason to believe that this is part of an old tale, a promise and recompense for wrongs done long ago. If this is so then you have become a champion, your human form has been wrought asunder and made anew with the power of the most beloved and brightest star of the Ainur."

I frowned in confusion, "I feel like there is a lot of backstory and explanation missing from that vague description of what may have happened to me," I scowled at Gandalf, waiting for him to say more. He did not respond. "A champion? For what cause? If what you say is true why wouldn't they just send the star down on its own to be a champion or better yet, pick someone who isn't an ill-mannered and self-serving whore," I eventually asked, in an attempt to get him to give me more information.

Adelia laughed, "maybe it picked you for your great bed side manner?" she smiled at me, using an old jibe that I had made of my profession previously. A part of me wanted to smile back, but I felt highly agitated. I didn't respond to her efforts at camaraderie. I looked back at Gandalf, who looked like he was thinking deeply, deciding what he should say and what he should not say. "The tale makes reference to you lending your light to combat the coming darkness. The choosing of a champion would not be left to mere chance. There must be _something_ within your character that has shown itself worthy to have earned this task," Gandalf said thoughtfully, if not a tad dubiously.

I looked out at the surrounding forest, becoming darker as the sun set in the distance behind the cover the of trees.

"Adelia and I plan to head to Bree, let us know when we have come as far as you can take us," was all I eventually said. The Shire was further along and would be taking us out of the way of Bree.

I ignored the look that Adelia was burning into the back of my head. "Did you just hear nothing of what Gandalf said?" she breathed, as if shocked at my behavior.

I shrugged, "Yes, I heard, but being a _star_ doesn't pay us wages or put dinner on the table. We are more likely to find shelter and work in Bree amongst our own kind, and besides, you heard Gandalf, he will call for me when he needs me to shine bright on the enemy," I smiled self deprecatingly towards her.

"While someone as noble as Gandalf would believe your promise, I for one know that you won't heed the promise given," she said, her green eyes staring into my own as if to will some decency out of me.

"Way to blow my sweet intentions, Adelia," I said looking to the heavens for divine intervention. "Now I believe it's high time to head our separate ways."

I waited for Adelia to agree with me and start saying her farewells to Gandalf but she didn't.

"I'm sorry Victoire, you have always been my protector and I have always followed your lead, but I won't follow you now," she said, her eyes hard and distant. She crossed her arms as if in an effort to close herself off from me. "I know that you won't leave without me, as I am all you have, so in staying by Gandalf's side I make you accountable for your promise and the expectations placed upon you to be a champion".

The words seemed to echo in the resulting silence. I felt like I would have heard a pin drop from a mile away. All thoughts and emotions escaped me as if I was cast adrift in an endless cavern of darkness. But the feelings of emptiness did not last long before they were replaced by betrayal and frustration. I continued to look into her eyes unblinkingly, so similar to my own but which showed no sign of her rethinking her stance.

I felt frozen through. For so long I had fought to survive and to shield my twin, Adelia, from all the darkness and decay of the world. For so long it had been the one thing pushing me to keep going.

At a young age I had been baptized in the fear that comes with being ripped apart by the world you once found so beautiful and good. My perception of the world had been altered but in the background of my grief I had seen that Adelia still had her innocence and I had strived to take all the hits that by chance I knew life would dole out for her too.

And yet she sat there on some moral high ground, looking down on me for taking actions that served my own and her interest. She still lived in a world where good prevailed over evil and the hero saved the day. I lived in a world where when the world was going up in flames the hero was the one who slithered away in the shadows and got the hell out of dodge.

In my mind there were two versions of myself, two distinct paths to take. There was one where I stayed and one where I jumped off the cart and disappeared into the trees, leaving my responsibilities and the painful reminder that I could never meet Adelia's expectations.

I often yearned to leave Adelia; it was a point of deep shame and guilt for me. I knew it would be much easier to live without the burden of feeling like I had to be my sister's protector but I also knew that leaving would not help remedy that burden. I would most likely drive myself insane with wondering if she was safe.

I took the second direction, as I always did and I continued to sit in the cart, back ramrod straight, expression carefully blank as inside I felt only turmoil.

"Fine, Adelia," I finally responded.

Gandalf's gaze felt like an unbearable weight, as if he were scrutinising every part of me and found me unworthy for what he had described me as being chosen to do

There had been many times where Adelia had scorned me for my actions, but none like this.

It was nearing dark when we came across an old man, his hair and beard long and filled with detritus and a stiff white chalk which seemed to hold it into the misshapen shape of something an animal could live in. His cloak was brown and in his arm was a staff. Beside him as he sat on a fallen tree trunk was a horse grazing.

As we came closer he stood up, recognition on his face.

"Ah Radagast the Brown!" Gandalf spoke, his voice booming with comradery and warmth. "What brings you so far from your hearth at Rhosgobel?"

The old man, Radagast, moved forward quickly, somewhat twitchy in his movements. "Gandalf I have an urgent errand," he said. "my news is evil." Then he looked about him, as if the hedges might have ears. "Nazgûl," he whispered. "The Nine are abroad again. They have crossed the River secretly and are moving westward. They have taken the guise of riders in black."

"I must advise Saruman of this news and ensure Frodo leaves the Shire with haste," Gandalf spoke, the news somehow deeply important by the way it seemed to incite great worry in Gandalf.

"Radagast my friend, I must ask of you a favor. Victoire and Adelia here need to be escorted to Rivendell," Gandalf entreated.

A look of unease graced Radagast's aged and weathered face, "Gandalf it is only with great need that I journeyed forth to bring you such evil tidings, I had hoped to not tarry on my journey home, I do not like leaving the Vales of the Anduin unguarded for so long," he said.

"It is only with great need that I request this of you, my friend. The star of Illmarë has been sent and I fear that Sauron is not unaware of this," Gandalf said gravely.

Radagast's eyes which had been clouded with concern for his homeland, his attention divided after imparting his tidings, cleared and returned to Gandalf before moving past him to Adelia and then myself.

"Oh my, of this I had no inkling. I wonder how I did not see it before – her aura is iridescent," he murmured. His attention returned to Gandalf, "If you suspect Sauron to know of her presence then I worry that Rivendell will become his focus," Radagast said with a frown.

"There is no helping it, her fate is connected with that of the One Ring and it is in Rivendell that we will decide our next move. It is imperative that you journey forth with utmost secrecy to delay his knowledge of her whereabouts. He will not yet know what form Illmarë has taken," Gandalf said.

I grew more confused by the moment with the words they spoke, trying to decipher what they meant about my fate. I had also been reluctant enough to journey with Gandalf let alone his wilder and more unwashed counterpart. I looked to Adelia who looked between Gandalf and Radagast with poorly concealed wonder. It would seem that Adelia was getting her great adventure.

I looked to the heavens with a long suffering sigh wondering why it could not be her that became the champion. She had honour and valour – she also had far superior patience and people skills than I.

* * *

 **TheHeartlessCrow** – Thanks so much for your lovely review! I am glad you like the story! There is nothing better than reading a good antihero story, I hope this continues to deliver :)


	3. Chapter 3

_She wore her scars as her best attire; a stunning dress made of hellfire_ – Daniel Saint.

 **Chapter Three**

Radagast the Brown was not a man; he was not defined by those common rules.

In fact, he was nothing like anyone that I had ever met before, and I often felt like I had met all the types of men of the world.

Adelia had been overjoyed at meeting two wizards and had unapologetically inundated our guide with questions. Adelia was fascinated with Radagast and talked with him on any subject that he was willing to return discourse on.

She was not deterred when he answered many questions in confusing riddles or became distracted with the environment around them, reorienting to the present company in his own time.

Radagast talked freely of his home in Rhosgobel on the western eaves of Mirkwood. He spoke with deep sadness of the loss of plant and animal life to darkness. At times he would sweep a discerning gaze over me as if I were a wounded and volatile animal in his dying forest that he wished to save.

It annoyed me that he could make me feel like I was so transparent; that he had me figured out.

"Do you know what the star of Ilmarë is old man?" I asked after a few days of travel. I decided to finally speak up to make some use of the situation. Perhaps he had the information that I sought.

He turned to me, watching me with squinting and watery eyes, "You were weary, immeasurably so, and yet you couldn't burn out. You are not a separate form, but two halves drawn back together, against your will." He moved forward and placed a hand on my shoulder, "The light is a part of you for better or worse."

I ducked from under his kindness, the explanation he gave burning like acid in my chest. For some reason they seared deep. "What kind of answer is that?" I asked, my voice flinty.

"The only answer," he said, his eyes seeming to pour into me, leaving no corner untouched.

I scowled and dropped back behind them.

* * *

I was gladdened when Radagast said that we were on the perimeter of Rivendell. We had avoided civilisation on our journey and I could still smell the dead on me. The stench of burnt skin and hair, and the metallic gore seemed to have settled into my hair and skin. Not to mention I was walking around all but naked except for a long cloak, cinched at the waist with some material torn from the bottom which caused it to come just above the knee.

I wasn't happy in the least to be a pawn for some wizard's machinations but I was hoping that I could get a bath and some clean clothes out of it.

We were walking through an area dense with trees when a group descended from the trees. From their lithe forms and pointed ears I guessed that they were elves. They were dressed in fine tunics and breaches coloured dark blue almost black with silver accents.

"Aiwendil, cormamin lindua ele lle! Mani naa lle Rivendell hin dúr anand sui hin? asked a male with long golden hair braided at his temples. _Aiwendil, my heart sings to see thee! What brings you to Rivendell in dark times such as these?_

The guards moved closer; the one who had spoken had an air of power and radiance. He embraced Radagast on the shoulder before turning his attention to Adelia and I.

His eyes were a deep blue and bright; they seemed knowing, as if he had seen many things both great and terrible.

"Lle quena I'lambe tel' Eldalie?" he directed at Adelia and I – specifically me, who he was studying with interest. _Do you speak elvish?_

The language felt familiar and comforting to me, similar to the feel of a warm fire in winter, yet I know I had never heard it before. I shook my head, gesturing that I did not understand.

"It is a pleasure to meet you both, I am Lord Glorfindel," he introduced himself in the common tongue, his accent leaving a pleasant twang to the otherwise harsher language.

Adelia moved forward, "I am Adelia and this is my sister Victoire, we are daughters of Hammònd."

An elf behind Glorfindel eyed me with distaste, "re usquener," he commented. _She is a smelly one._

"Faarea," Glorfindel spoke over his shoulder. _Enough_.

"Re uumerangwa ami" he responded with a smirk, earning some smiles from his comrades. _She doesn't understand me._

"Lye quen telwan," Glorfindel shot a look towards the elf behind him. His facial features didn't change, his eyes however hardened. _We will speak later._

"Follow me, you look wearied," Glorfindel gestured to the path ahead.

Radagast moved forward, "we will need to speak to Lord Elrond immediately; however afterwards, I would much like to content myself with the hospitality of the elves. We have gone for many days with little food."

Glorfindel smiled; it was a slight tilt of the lips and yet it bathed his face in joy. "I am sure we can accommodate our beloved brown istar and his charges."

I couldn't help but take Glorfindel in as if he were water in a desert. It was true the other elves in his retinue were no less lovely to behold, but Glorfindel was something altogether different. He held an inner peace and light that was captivating.

I was good at judging a person's character quickly from their verbal and non-verbal cues and I was usually right. However I never staked anything of importance on my assessment, just in case I was proven wrong; in fact I anticipated being proved wrong, so I was never disappointed or left stranded without a back up plan.

The fact that a mere stranger could invoke feelings of respect so quickly was unacceptable. Next I would start letting my guard down and trusting everyone and their dog not to screw me over.

I gave a hard look, or my scary dead look as Adelia called it, at the elf who had looked at me like I was the dirt beneath his boot; his lip curled but he looked away. I gave myself a mental pat on the back – I still had it.

Rivendell was spectacular and it seemed that all of the Eldar were fair. I couldn't help but wonder if there was a brothel here where I could work. No doubt I would much prefer the type of clientele; it seemed like there was little risk of having patrons who looked part orc and burnt the nose worse than one.

But if what I had heard of the Eldar's morals were true; they would perhaps look down on such an establishment.

We were brought to a grand room that overlooked the sloping mountain ranges, water dropping for magnificent heights at several points. Glorfindel left us and returned with another male elf; where Glorfindel's hair was the radient sunrise, this elf's hair was the mysterious midnight. His grey eyes were piercing, making me feel like nothing could be hidden under his gaze.

"Welcome to Rivendell Aiwendil and to your charges, Adelia and Victoire, daughters of Hammònd; I am Lord Elrond. You insisted haste with our meeting," he bowed his head at Radagast before gesturing to the seats that surrounded a crackling fire. I followed the lead of Radagast who moved to one. Glorfindel took a seat also.

"I met with Gandalf to share with him the news of the nine that ride ever closer westward. Gandalf left to seek the counsel of Sarumen and advise Frodo to make haste with his plans to leave the shire. He entrusted me with an important errand. The star of Illmarë has been found," Radagast looked to me with eyes that glimmered intensly in the firelight.

The two lords regarded me, their emotions unreadable. Glorfindel spoke first, "I wondered at you when we first me beyond the gate; such light that hasn't been seen for many a millennium, though no longer truly radiant," he mused.

I felt like an animal on display at the market as they watched me, pondering what to make of me.

"Ripped asunder I do not believe she is yet whole, despite what Varda intended," Radagast spoke.

I lost my patience. "I don't understand! All you talk of is riddles of halves and wholes. I want an explanation," I seethed. If I had expected the lords to stumble over me in their efforts to sate my need for knowledge, I would have been bitterly disappointed.

"We will need to help you to gain control of your light, it is dangerous for you to feel heightened emotions until then," Lord Elrond said severely. "Your temper could be the ruin of everything."

"I would prefer to not be here, so maybe I should take me and my volatile human emotions with me," I stood up.

"Victoire no, you promised!" Adelia jerked to her feet, grabbing my hand.

"What is a promise worth? if you think it is worth anything you are a fool Adelia," I sneered.

Adelia straightened her back turning to the Lords and Radagast, "where I go she will follow and I am convinced of this path, her threats are empty."

I tore my hand away, anger burning my chest wide. I didn't notice the light that emitted from me until the Lords stood and moved back; Elrond thundered, "Calm yourself! Get yourself under control! Adelia stand back!"

The light that surrounded me obliterated the chairs around me. Once released, it felt like pulling back on the chains of a dozen wargs. I breathed in deeply, imaging the place in my mind where I went to escape. The numberless grains of sand glistening like jewels against sundrenched water as it lapped against my skin comfortingly. The sky was a periwinkle blue, free from the shrouding of clouds; and beyond that only the bliss of an eternity of this feeling.

The yelling stopped and I pulled myself harshly back to the present, opening my eyes to see the sheer destruction I had wrought on the room. The other occupants were against the far wall, and after a gap of several meters was the circle of destruction, of which I was the center. The stone floor was burnt black as charcoal and nothing in my radius had survived beyond the remains of ashes.

I didn't feel the rough material of my cloak anymore. I noticed beyond the archway of the entrance to the room were multiple guards.

"Do you see now the importance of control? You could have killed us all; in your current state you are a liability!" Elrond asked, his voice treacherously calm. He turned to Radagast, "Aiwendil, do you have any solutions to our current predicament?"

"There is one, but it will not be pleasant for Victoire," he spoke, his countenance one of pain as he watched me. It brought me back to the woods where he had first looked at me like that. Only I had the sinking feeling that he looked so wretched because to him I was one of the lost; one of the many animals razed by the dark woods, that he couldn't save.

* * *

The plot thickens, please review!


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